The Other Day.

Adrian requested coleslaw.
Since when did Adrian like coleslaw?
I didn't complain, I'll change that boy yet.
Before he's dead he'll enjoy eating onions like apples.
He will!
Coleslaw is just the beginning!
Today was the day I decided to make slaw.
So there I am grating carrots.
Next thing I know,
My knuckles bleeding,
And there's my thumb in the slaw.
If you know me at all or where I come from.
You know my tolerance for blood.
It's pretty low.
Blood is just so red.
And irony.
And red.
I looked at my thumb.
I could see white stuff in the hole of my thumb.
What is the white stuff?
I got light headed.
RED and WHITE!
I called my mom.
She said run it under cold water.
I know this.
Wrap it tight and hold it.
I know this.
All I had was toilet paper.
The toilet paper wasn't working well.
My mom said to use a maxi pad.
(don't worry, I'm not embarrassed, see post below, I don't care if you're embarrassed)
I did.
She told me to sit down.
I did.
She told me to get my thumb skin out of the carrots.
I did.
Later I traded my maxi pad for more toilet paper.
Knocked on the next door neighbor's door.
Nothing.
Then the next neighbor.
Nothing.
Next neighbor.
Success.
"Aaron do you have a band aid?"
"What did you do?"
"Grated my knuckle."
"Let me see?"
...
"Oh, It's not that bad, I used to be an EMT."
"Oh, yeah yeah it's not too bad."
(that's me being tough, because come on I was raised with 3 brothers I can handle anything.
But it's so RED! and what's the WHITE stuff?)
He didn't have a band aid.
But he did have gauze.
He tried to give me 3 packages of it.
I took one.
You never know when I might need more.
I'll know who's door to knock on first.
So like a true farmer's daughter, I rigged me up a nice scotch/masking tape bandage.
Long story longer, The coleslaw was great.
Adrian didn't appreciate all that "went into" it.

so here's the recipe:

8 c. cabbage, finely chopped
1/4 c. shredded carrot
(or you can use a couple bags of the pre-chopped cabbage-carrot mixture)
1/3 c. sugar
1/8 tsp. salt
1/8 tsp. pepper
1 1/4 c. milk
1/2 c. mayonnaise
1/4 c. buttermilk
1 1/2 Tbsp. white vinegar
2 1/2 Tbsp. lemon juice
1 1/2 Tbsp. mustard (optional, but adds a nice flavor)
1/2 thumb knuckle optional

Chop up the cabbage and carrots into fine pieces. In a large bowl, combine sugar, salt, pepper, milk, mayonnaise, buttermilk, vinegar, lemon juice and mustard, and whisk until smooth. Add the cabbage and carrots. Mix well. Cover and refrigerate overnight. Drain excess liquid and stir well before serving.


I even snuck mustard into the slaw. That's right I'll have that Adrian boy yet! And maybe learn how to write in complete sentences too. While this episode was happening it seemed a lot more funny. Probably because of the comments that were coming to my mind, but I can't recall or write because I'm not clever enough with words and too much blood loss has made my memory fuzzy! ;)

Did I just use one of these ;) ? Yep, yep I did.